Depression

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Bit of a slump :(

Crohns symptoms are playing up and I've started being nauseous a lot and bringing up bile. My gastro appointments keep being cancelled. Was supposed to be seen in August, then it got moved to September, then it got moved to October. Now it's been cancelled altogether and they will be in touch when they can make a new one.

Still got the female issues and I'm still anaemic. Still waiting for an ultrasound scan for that as they post a random appointment out and if you can't attend, it's tough! Was unable to attend the first appointment as I was away on holiday but said I could attend anytime in August. They sent another appointment out for September which clashed with a gastro appointment that I couldn't change (and frustratingly that is the one that has now been cancelled!) When I ring up, I've been told I'm back of the queue as I've refused two appointments so I just have to wait. GP won't help until I have the scan, so I'm just stuck in limbo and worried sick about things.

Eldest moving out has really hit me hard. He's like my best friend and I talked to him a lot every day about random crap. I miss him so much. I knew I was going to be upset and this day would come one day, but it's harder than I thought.

Then just loads of niggly things have built up and I just feel like I'm wading in treacle again and getting nowhere :neutral:
 


becs said:
Bit of a slump :(

Crohns symptoms are playing up and I've started being nauseous a lot and bringing up bile. My gastro appointments keep being cancelled. Was supposed to be seen in August, then it got moved to September, then it got moved to October. Now it's been cancelled altogether and they will be in touch when they can make a new one.

Still got the female issues and I'm still anaemic. Still waiting for an ultrasound scan for that as they post a random appointment out and if you can't attend, it's tough! Was unable to attend the first appointment as I was away on holiday but said I could attend anytime in August. They sent another appointment out for September which clashed with a gastro appointment that I couldn't change (and frustratingly that is the one that has now been cancelled!) When I ring up, I've been told I'm back of the queue as I've refused two appointments so I just have to wait. GP won't help until I have the scan, so I'm just stuck in limbo and worried sick about things.

Eldest moving out has really hit me hard. He's like my best friend and I talked to him a lot every day about random crap. I miss him so much. I knew I was going to be upset and this day would come one day, but it's harder than I thought.

Then just loads of niggly things have built up and I just feel like I'm wading in treacle again and getting nowhere :neutral:
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Sorry to hear your having a rough time becs! I suppose as someone who moved out the family home not so long ago you never really think of the people you leave there. If you need to talk you know where I am.

I'm struggling at the moment too life just seems to be constantly punching me in the face, I get over one thing get a couple of minutes peace and then something else hits me
 
becs said:
Bit of a slump :(

Crohns symptoms are playing up and I've started being nauseous a lot and bringing up bile. My gastro appointments keep being cancelled. Was supposed to be seen in August, then it got moved to September, then it got moved to October. Now it's been cancelled altogether and they will be in touch when they can make a new one.

Still got the female issues and I'm still anaemic. Still waiting for an ultrasound scan for that as they post a random appointment out and if you can't attend, it's tough! Was unable to attend the first appointment as I was away on holiday but said I could attend anytime in August. They sent another appointment out for September which clashed with a gastro appointment that I couldn't change (and frustratingly that is the one that has now been cancelled!) When I ring up, I've been told I'm back of the queue as I've refused two appointments so I just have to wait. GP won't help until I have the scan, so I'm just stuck in limbo and worried sick about things.

Eldest moving out has really hit me hard. He's like my best friend and I talked to him a lot every day about random crap. I miss him so much. I knew I was going to be upset and this day would come one day, but it's harder than I thought.

Then just loads of niggly things have built up and I just feel like I'm wading in treacle again and getting nowhere :neutral:
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Best wishes Becs.
It's quite often the least deserving people that this illness affects, sadly.

Has your eldest lad moved out for ease of commute reasons, or so he's experiencing the whole uni thing properly by living away from home etc???
 
becs said:
Bit of a slump :(

Crohns symptoms are playing up and I've started being nauseous a lot and bringing up bile. My gastro appointments keep being cancelled. Was supposed to be seen in August, then it got moved to September, then it got moved to October. Now it's been cancelled altogether and they will be in touch when they can make a new one.

Still got the female issues and I'm still anaemic. Still waiting for an ultrasound scan for that as they post a random appointment out and if you can't attend, it's tough! Was unable to attend the first appointment as I was away on holiday but said I could attend anytime in August. They sent another appointment out for September which clashed with a gastro appointment that I couldn't change (and frustratingly that is the one that has now been cancelled!) When I ring up, I've been told I'm back of the queue as I've refused two appointments so I just have to wait. GP won't help until I have the scan, so I'm just stuck in limbo and worried sick about things.

Eldest moving out has really hit me hard. He's like my best friend and I talked to him a lot every day about random crap. I miss him so much. I knew I was going to be upset and this day would come one day, but it's harder than I thought.

Then just loads of niggly things have built up and I just feel like I'm wading in treacle again and getting nowhere :neutral:
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Hope things pick up Becs. Well they will pick up but I hope they pick up quickly!
 
becs said:
Bit of a slump :(

Crohns symptoms are playing up and I've started being nauseous a lot and bringing up bile. My gastro appointments keep being cancelled. Was supposed to be seen in August, then it got moved to September, then it got moved to October. Now it's been cancelled altogether and they will be in touch when they can make a new one.

Still got the female issues and I'm still anaemic. Still waiting for an ultrasound scan for that as they post a random appointment out and if you can't attend, it's tough! Was unable to attend the first appointment as I was away on holiday but said I could attend anytime in August. They sent another appointment out for September which clashed with a gastro appointment that I couldn't change (and frustratingly that is the one that has now been cancelled!) When I ring up, I've been told I'm back of the queue as I've refused two appointments so I just have to wait. GP won't help until I have the scan, so I'm just stuck in limbo and worried sick about things.

Eldest moving out has really hit me hard. He's like my best friend and I talked to him a lot every day about random crap. I miss him so much. I knew I was going to be upset and this day would come one day, but it's harder than I thought.

Then just loads of niggly things have built up and I just feel like I'm wading in treacle again and getting nowhere :neutral:
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Chin up. It's shite waiting and even worse when you're waiting to wait. A positive to take from your eldest moving out is that he will need your support over the coming weeks and that should keep your mind occupied, try not to worry too much (easier said than done) and know that you have the experience to be able to help him.

If you ever need anyone to talk to about random crap then just post on here... you'll get some daft responses, some decent responses but more than anything it will give you something else to think about and engage with which is always good when your mind is full of 20kg weights.
 
NewAdventuresInWiFi said:
Has your eldest lad moved out for ease of commute reasons, or so he's experiencing the whole uni thing properly by living away from home etc???
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Mixture of reasons - wants to be independent, he's much closer to the uni and he's in within walking distance of the nightlife. Taxi's are expensive back to here.

Just seems to have been one of them days when lots of little things went wrong. A usually simple audit turned into a headache as the store have moved everything around, delisted some items and introduced new ones so I've got loads of new product reports to do. I was doing some other calls putting up cardboard stands that were made from razor sharp pieces of cardboard and now my hands are covered in cuts so typing hurts.

My work week is fairly busy but I've lost a day tomorrow as I'm getting some work done on the house and tomorrow was the best day for them! Now I'm worrying about fitting everything in on Thurs and Fri.

I did an online food shop last night to save time which was supposed to be here between 8pm-9pm. They're running late and it's still not here. I've put a intensive oil treatment on my hair as it was all dry and frizzy thinking I'd go in the shower and wash it off after the delivery had been. So now I'm still sitting here with manky oil covered hair wondering if the shopping is ever going to get here and if I'll ever get in the shower and get it washed off. The shopping had better turn up as I've got no milk and stuff and I can't get out tomorrow as the workmen are coming first thing. Nothing is ever simple!
 
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becs said:
Mixture of reasons - wants to be independent, he's much closer to the uni and he's in within walking distance of the nightlife. Taxi's are expensive back to here.

Just seems to have been one of them days when lots of little things went wrong. A usually simple audit turned into a headache as the store have moved everything around, delisted some items and introduced new ones so I've got loads of new product reports to do. I was doing some other calls putting up cardboard stands that were made from razor sharp pieces of cardboard and now my hands are covered in cuts so typing hurts.

My work week is fairly busy but I've lost a day tomorrow as I'm getting some work done on the house and tomorrow was the best day for them! Now I'm worrying about fitting everything in on Thurs and Fri.

I did an online food shop last night to save time which was supposed to be here between 8pm-9pm. They're running late and it's still not here. I've put a intensive oil treatment on my hair as it was all dry and frizzy thinking I'd go in the shower and wash it off after the delivery had been. So now I'm still sitting here with manky oil covered hair wondering if the shopping is ever going to get here and if I'll ever get in the shower and get it washed off. The shopping had better turn up as I've got no milk and stuff and I can't get out tomorrow as the workmen are coming first thing. Nothing is ever simple!
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Hopefully tomorrow will be better for you then.

Your eldest leaving home is a really significant moment no matter what the circumstances & it's perfectly understandable to be upset & emotional about it.

At least you get a full weekend off after a busy end to the working week, with nee football to ruin it this Saturday or Sunday ;)

Fingers crossed for ya pet!
 
Hesitant to post on this thread again but I find it to be a good release to get something written down and I'm struggling so needs must.

Had a few recent health issues, nothing that is going to hurt me now, but a few problems that will catch up with me in later life if I don't take care of myself. Doctor could see that I was down and has asked me to go back to discuss my mood further and also recommended psychotherapy to address depression, stress and anxiety issues.

He went through the usual questions and the usual "do you ever think about killing yourself?" was asked. My answer was no (which is true) but it made me think, and although I don't want to kill myself, I don't really have any desire for life at all. I'm never happy anymore, I'm merely distracted for a while until I'm back here again.

I'm only 32 for fucks sake, my whole life is supposed to be in front of me. I can see all the things that make normal people happy and they're all achievable, but I can't find a way to want anything out of life or fight for it.

I'm going to take them up on the psychotherapy offer but not sure if I can truly open up, and if I do, I'll end up bawling like a baby.
 
I'm starting to get a bit wound up. Had an appointment with neurology, which they cancelled, because they said it was unnecessary. I was a bit unsure about this because I'd been told by my GP it was important. Went back to the GP and asked what he thought, he's said he's completely uncomfortable about the cancellation and will write to them to tell them they need to go ahead with it. This appointment was meant to be a week ago and I have no idea if / when it'll happen. Frustrating to be in limbo between two people in the nhs saying different things.

Flash Gordon said:
Hesitant to post on this thread again but I find it to be a good release to get something written down and I'm struggling so needs must.

Had a few recent health issues, nothing that is going to hurt me now, but a few problems that will catch up with me in later life if I don't take care of myself. Doctor could see that I was down and has asked me to go back to discuss my mood further and also recommended psychotherapy to address depression, stress and anxiety issues.

He went through the usual questions and the usual "do you ever think about killing yourself?" was asked. My answer was no (which is true) but it made me think, and although I don't want to kill myself, I don't really have any desire for life at all. I'm never happy anymore, I'm merely distracted for a while until I'm back here again.

I'm only 32 for fucks sake, my whole life is supposed to be in front of me. I can see all the things that make normal people happy and they're all achievable, but I can't find a way to want anything out of life or fight for it.

I'm going to take them up on the psychotherapy offer but not sure if I can truly open up, and if I do, I'll end up bawling like a baby.
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To be honest, I think if you do open up and wind up bawling like a baby you'll probably get a lot from it. I've rarely heard of people who got nothing out of therapy because they opened up too much.
 
I am sure there are many symptoms of depression, I know this because I used to use some of these symptoms for sick notes at my last job :lol:

However in recent weeks I am so so antisocial. I dont want to interact with anyone face to face unless I have to. I have been going for jogs in the woods at 6am rather than 10am gym session as cant be bothered to talk to people. Mates ask me for a pint or even just to pop something round their house and I will do everything to avoid doing it. Today I have to go out to the game, its a bit of a dread and if it wasnt for my dad paying for my season ticket, I would watch it on tv so I dont have to talk to loads of people. I dont know if its a confidence thing?
Didnt have the best weekends either. Sure I have low testosterone or something as have absolutely no motivation to do owt, so unlike me to 6 months ago.
 
Ceverton said:
I am sure there are many symptoms of depression, I know this because I used to use some of these symptoms for sick notes at my last job :lol:

However in recent weeks I am so so antisocial. I dont want to interact with anyone face to face unless I have to. I have been going for jogs in the woods at 6am rather than 10am gym session as cant be bothered to talk to people. Mates ask me for a pint or even just to pop something round their house and I will do everything to avoid doing it. Today I have to go out to the game, its a bit of a dread and if it wasnt for my dad paying for my season ticket, I would watch it on tv so I dont have to talk to loads of people. I dont know if its a confidence thing?
Didnt have the best weekends either. Sure I have low testosterone or something as have absolutely no motivation to do owt, so unlike me to 6 months ago.
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its hard to explain im similar im bored loads I arrange to do something with my mates then when it gets round to it I back out because I cba with it.
 
Ceverton said:
I am sure there are many symptoms of depression, I know this because I used to use some of these symptoms for sick notes at my last job :lol:

However in recent weeks I am so so antisocial. I dont want to interact with anyone face to face unless I have to. I have been going for jogs in the woods at 6am rather than 10am gym session as cant be bothered to talk to people. Mates ask me for a pint or even just to pop something round their house and I will do everything to avoid doing it. Today I have to go out to the game, its a bit of a dread and if it wasnt for my dad paying for my season ticket, I would watch it on tv so I dont have to talk to loads of people. I dont know if its a confidence thing?
Didnt have the best weekends either. Sure I have low testosterone or something as have absolutely no motivation to do owt, so unlike me to 6 months ago.
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Karma marra :lol:
 
Same here. I met someone for a cuppa and a natter yesterday.

I woke up on a bit of a downer as I was supposed to be doing the GNR but I'm too poorly to run it so I gave my number away (to someone who raised lots of money for Bradley so I'm really pleased some good use came out of it!) Kept seeing pics of people and was wishing I was there with them.

It was a massive effort to get out of the house and go and I felt wobbly on the way through. When I got there, it was so relaxed and I had a lovely chat and a giggle and all the wobbly feelings just vanished!

Try really hard to get out. Once you get out and your mind gets busy concentrating on something or you're distracted by people or doing an activity, it can't wander into wobbly territory. Staying in makes the wobbles worse and sometimes makes little things build up into big scary things.

So I'm up for a cuppa and some wobbly thoughts bashing if anyone wants one!
 
becs said:
Same here. I met someone for a cuppa and a natter yesterday.

I woke up on a bit of a downer as I was supposed to be doing the GNR but I'm too poorly to run it so I gave my number away (to someone who raised lots of money for Bradley so I'm really pleased some good use came out of it!) Kept seeing pics of people and was wishing I was there with them.

It was a massive effort to get out of the house and go and I felt wobbly on the way through. When I got there, it was so relaxed and I had a lovely chat and a giggle and all the wobbly feelings just vanished!

Try really hard to get out. Once you get out and your mind gets busy concentrating on something or you're distracted by people or doing an activity, it can't wander into wobbly territory. Staying in makes the wobbles worse and sometimes makes little things build up into big scary things.

So I'm up for a cuppa and some wobbly thoughts bashing if anyone wants one!
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I'm the opposite. I arrange to loads of stuff but about 75% of the time I just end up being a bit withdrawn and distracted thinking about everything that I could be doing instead. Feeling guilty that I'm even trying to enjoy myself. Although I'm getting much better.
 
I'm free for a cuppa tomorrow if you fancy it Becs?

I'm trying to keep myself going, I did the great north run yesterday & im feeling so proud of myself considering I was nearly hospitalised earlier this year. Last year though I dropped through the floor and was really poorly once the adrenaline wore off so I'm trying to take of myself at the minute. (I must admit though, reading another thread on here has made me feel shite about what I did & my rubbish time)
 
Any one taking Mirtazapine?

GP has put me on 30mg a day apart from my sleep improving i am feeling a lot worse then i was with Sertraline
 
becs said:
Same here. I met someone for a cuppa and a natter yesterday.

I woke up on a bit of a downer as I was supposed to be doing the GNR but I'm too poorly to run it so I gave my number away (to someone who raised lots of money for Bradley so I'm really pleased some good use came out of it!) Kept seeing pics of people and was wishing I was there with them.

It was a massive effort to get out of the house and go and I felt wobbly on the way through. When I got there, it was so relaxed and I had a lovely chat and a giggle and all the wobbly feelings just vanished!

Try really hard to get out. Once you get out and your mind gets busy concentrating on something or you're distracted by people or doing an activity, it can't wander into wobbly territory. Staying in makes the wobbles worse and sometimes makes little things build up into big scary things.

So I'm up for a cuppa and some wobbly thoughts bashing if anyone wants one!
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Costa coffee at 1pm? ;)

I have to drop some money off for my mate today, Im thinking about not even buying the item I want because I cant be arsed with interaction and leaving the house :lol:. I am going to erotically asphyxiate myself to death arent I?
 
mackem_jo2 said:
I'm free for a cuppa tomorrow if you fancy it Becs?

I'm trying to keep myself going, I did the great north run yesterday & im feeling so proud of myself considering I was nearly hospitalised earlier this year. Last year though I dropped through the floor and was really poorly once the adrenaline wore off so I'm trying to take of myself at the minute. (I must admit though, reading another thread on here has made me feel shite about what I did & my rubbish time)
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I've got deadlines at work tomorrow - typical! Can do wed, Thurs or Fri though or bairn is at her Dad's next weekend so I'm free all weekend.

Ignore the knobs on the other thread. Be proud of what you did. After all you've been through, you were bloody amazing and I'm jealous of you (in a nice way not a bitchy way!)

Kubicki said:
Any one taking Mirtazapine?

GP has put me on 30mg a day apart from my sleep improving i am feeling a lot worse then i was with Sertraline
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I've been on that but struggled with it. It made me too sleepy. I was taking it about 6pm and woke up feeling groggy and fuzzy headed until about 3pm the next day. I drive around for work and didn't feel safe driving so I stopped taking them.
 
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