I had this idea this morning, it might be shit, it might work, I don't know.  I thought I'd do a Q&A of the same sort that has been done for years in the guardian saturday magazine.  So I copied the questions and gave it a go, just thought people might like to get more of a handle on me (which they probably don't!)

When were you happiest?
When I finally got the words 'will you marry me?' to come out of my mouth on a bitterly cold Beachy Head on Christmas Eve last year.  I was hugging her tightly to protect her from the wind at the time.
What is your greatest fear?
Being next to big ships in the water.  Ultimate nightmare, in a msall boat as a fucking massive nuclear sub surfaces quickly next to the boat.  I'd puke for hours if that ever happened *shudder*
What is your earliest memory?
Lying in a hospital with my mam while I got stitches in my face after falling over again
Which living person do you most admire and why?
Terence malick for beautiful poetic films, Paul Davies physicist and science writer, Peter Singer, founder of the animal liberation movement, he created the term with a book of the same name
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Picking my nose.  All the fucking time.
Aside form property, what's the most expensive thing you've bought?
I hummed and harred over a jumper from a wanky 'poe faced covent garden shitstack' as charlie brooker may say.  My then girlfriend convinced me to buy it.  It was a camouflage light knitted jumper with a red star on, I thought it was fucking cool (it's not as horrendous as that description makes it sound).  I went in to work on the Friday thinking 'oh yes.  I was all co-ordinated and everything.  First thing anyone says is the sarky Aussie bloke in  the office who was a great laugh, very witty.  'Alright Bill?' (as in bill cosby, he of shameful jumpers), I felt deflated like a burst casey and barely ever wore it ever again.  200  quid pissed away.
What is your most treasured possession?
I don't really have treasured possessions but I guess my books would be it.  Actually, the pocket watch the missus got me that is engraved inside the back cover with 'our souls entwined for all time'.  Gorgeous, I love pocket watches.
Where would you like to live?
Icklesham on the A259 coast road between Rye and Hastings
What makes you depressed?
Life going unappreciated, give it to me you shits if you don't want it!  :)
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
My head is slightly too big.  Well, I have a big melon head, truth be told.  The embarrassing times I've gone carting or been in the position where people have jokingly wanted to stick a hat on me and find that none of them fit because of my fucking huge bonce.
What is your favourite smell?
creosote and new packing foam (it's good when it ages too, I have many bits of foam round the house which I have the odd sniff of).  Also the smell of the ground after it has rained on a hot day
What is your favourite book?
oooo, toughy, give me some thinking time on this one.
What is your favourite word?
infinite/cunt.
Is it better to give or receive?
Give
What do you owe your parents?
From my mam, the ability to care for strangers in distress and friends in need.  From my dad that calm outer shell, I like to think I have a bit of that quality.  And maybe his ability to hug, I’m not anywhere near as big and tall as him though so I can’t quite give the bear hugs he can give.
To whom would you most like to say sorry and why?
Err, lots of people, I’ve been a right cunt, unfortunately.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
Do you need to ask!  The missus of course
Have you ever said 'I love you' and not meant it?
Pretty sure I haven't
What was the best kiss of your life?
After the question fell out and she said yes on Beachy Head
Who would you invite to your dream dinner party?
William Wilberforce, Peter Singer, Jim Cronin, Brian Green, Paul Davies, and the missus and family.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
'fucking minging' 'shit/shite/shat' 'cunt'
What has been your biggest disappointment?
Not taking a different career path in to something far more mentally challenging but also to do with nature.  I dunno what that would be like.
When did you last cry and why?
This morning/last night as I explained to the missus how I will always be with her, when she's lonely imagine my big (but now sadly much thinner) arms around her hugging her and not letting go.   I'd be beside her when she does a fart that smells like over boiled vegetables and pensioners and I'd be telling her 'that's fucking minging'
How do you relax?
Nothing relaxes as much as a great shit (except when you have evil piles and shitting becomes the fear bringer)
What is the closest you've ever come to death?
Silly question!  Well, I was almost struck by lightning on the cliffs by Portpatrick in Scotland when I was very young and running to the ruined castle for shelter from the storm.  It struck just beside me, on some barbed wire.
What single thing would improve the quality of your life?
Some more.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
A special thing of making someone laugh.  I want to ask the persons permission to print their story anonymously.  The other thing was waiting in a fried chicken 'restaurant' in Croydon after being on the beer.  The staff in there were a lovely bunch of Indian fellas.  The Croydon scum in front were verbal abusing them, telling them to hurry up and referring to them as pakis.  I whispered to my mate how i couldn't hold back and he said 'don't, you'll get your head kicked in' and I just said that well, I'll get my head kicked in.  My mate was prepared to stand with me and get a hiding (thanks Rob) and I just said 'pack it in lads, they are working very hard'.  They looked at  me like I was odd but then just got their food and walked off without a word and no kicking in was involved (I haven't had a fight since fulwell juniour school).  The blokes were so chuffed and appreciative and always gave me extra chips from then on :-P

Oh and one more, on my Jordan trek, helping a woman who was petrified of heights through the Jordan mountains out the back of petra.  She closed her eyes the whole way and I held her hand and talked to her, even when I was shitting myself something chronic.  The guide thanked me profusely and offered me to come and stay with his family again for free.  She held my hand for a bit more too, she was a 50 year old mother from Glasgow, and very lovely warm person
What keeps you awake at night?
'God' bursting my head like a melon
How would you like to be remembered?
With a smile, a laugh and a tear.
Where would you  most like to be right now?
On Beachy Head with the missus